|I'm Zeke. I run FiveMinute.net, a parody site. I'll be using this dA mostly for short pieces that don't fit well there (although there may be some overlap).|
Apocalypse NaoApocalypse Nao by commodorezeke
The Obsidian Prince had been very patient. For three hundred years, he had awaited the next HiME Festival — his next chance to change the world. Meticulous planning and manipulation on a scale that few mortals could even comprehend, all working toward one goal: the selection of one woman of perfect power, strength, and determination, the only one worthy to usher in the new world at his side.
"Frankly," he told the red-haired delinquent that Nagi had brought to meet him, "I expected better."
Nao snorted rudely. "You and me both. What's the deal with —"
"Silence. Is this a trick? Are you here as part of some plan?"
"Yeah, your plan. What are you complaining about? Nagi laid it out for us: we kill each other's Childs, winner gets badass power. I'm the winner. Gimme."
"This is ridiculous," the Prince growled to Nagi. "Her? This low-class whelp defeated Kiyohime? Kagutsuchi? Miroku?"
Nagi shrugged. "I know, right? I had her pegged for sixth place or so. Funn
Tea For TwoWashington, D.C.Tea For Two by commodorezeke
The Oval Office was even bigger than Mio had expected. She stared in amazement, trying to take it all in. This was one of the last places in the world she'd ever expected to be.
Movement drew her attention, and Mio realized a man was stepping towards her. She froze with panic. It's really him. It's the president!
Indeed it was. Mio had seen him on the news, but in person was another story. For a girl who still found bus drivers a little intimidating, being in the presence of the leader of the free world was right off the charts. He only had a few inches on her, but to Mio, he might as well have been fifty feet tall.
The president, for his part, was perfectly at ease. He smiled warmly at Mio and extended his hand. "Miss Akiyama. Thank you for coming."
Mio jumped back and bowed so low she nearly snapped in half. "I am honoured, Mr. Sir President Obama-dono! Sir!"
"It's okay," said the president, holding back a chuckle. "We're friends he
Don't Say Stop Believin', Ch.4Chapter 4: Can't Fight This FeelingDon't Say Stop Believin', Ch.4 by commodorezeke
Five minutes ago, Jun had burst in and announced her intention to join the light music club. Three minutes ago, most of the club members had decided she was serious. One minute ago, she had convinced Azusa that it wasn't a prank and she really was serious, honest. Probably.
Now, Jun was hanging out by the instruments with Ui while everyone else huddled around the tea table in conference.
"I vote no," said Ritsu.
Mio glared at her. "How long have we been trying to get new members for this club? And now one comes right through our door and you object!"
"At any other time, this would be awesome. But now?" Ritsu shook her head. "This is how it goes wrong in the movies. The caper always falls apart when you take on somebody who's not in on it."
"A band is not a caper!"
"But our concert plan essentially is," said Tsumugi. "Ricchan has a point."
"Then this is one more good reason to drop the whole thing!" Mio threw up her hands.
Don't Say Stop Believin', Ch.3Chapter 3: Defying GravityDon't Say Stop Believin', Ch.3 by commodorezeke
Dawn hadn't quite broken, but Sawako was already at school — with Tsumugi, whom she'd asked to come in early for a special meeting.
"So that's my idea for your gimmick," finished Sawako. "Now be honest — would doing this upset you? If so, I'll understand."
Tsumugi was silent. Sawako could see her eyes starting to well up with tears.
Uh oh, the teacher thought. "I'm sorry! I won't make you do it. Forget I even —"
The blonde shook her head firmly. "I'm... I'm just so happy..."
"This is something I never even dreamed could happen. I've never been so touched..." She rubbed the tears from her eyes. "Of course I'll do it, Teacher! It will be an honour!"
In every life, there are key points of decision — moments when our future hinges on the choice we make. Sawako didn't realize it, but she had just hit one of those moments.
She could tell that something about Tsumugi's reaction was... off. The girl was far too
Things I've learned about deviantart1. If they have the word 'fox' in their name, be wary.Things I've learned about deviantart by missgreeney
2. If someone's gallery features exactly one kind of thing in it then it's probably their fetish.
3. Everything about heartbreak has already been said.
4. People who hate Twilight talk about it way more than people who like it.
5. There has never been a talented inflation artist ever.
6. Some people will only reply to comments if they're in another language, no matter how good their english might be.
7. Everyone loves Japan and if you don't, you are racist.
8. Nudity makes people lose their shit.
9. Only 3 people out of a hundred watchers will comment on something you've done. Only 10 will favorite it.
10. If someone doesn't have an icon for their account, it means they're going to do something to get them banned.
11. Every artist has glasses, no matter what.
12. Everyone started out drawing anime.
13. No one does art trades but everyone does commissions.
14. You will never get anyone's 500 000th pageview and get a free drawing.